I ' ve been reconnaissance a trend lately while working with women suffering from health issues. I coach women with pelvic pain issues of any potpourri, and I can ' t help but thought some commonalities. I am no longer surprised when I hear person after person specify herself as a unrealistic, an overachiever, a type A personality, an anxiety burnt offering, or someone who is very shy. Though not every client has all of these nature, these do seem to be the most common issues returned by women dealing with pelvic pain issues. I considerably have all of the large personality mood. As I ' ve pondered the connections between these stuff, the health issues, and my coaching knowledge, I have existent to develop a theory.
I call up being described one time as a somatizer by a medical trained. The definition of a somatizer is " a kind with frequent physical complaints for which no organic basis is found. " Well, that unquestionably did call me, I agree. However, that didn ' t really help me penetrate myself or act toward healing. Having learned Martha Beck ' s coaching tools, I can now connect the dots between my personality, study processes, and disease.
The main Martha Beck tool you need to dig this connection is called the Body Compass. It is really an awareness of your own physical self, and position your deepest unhappiness and greatest joy reside within you, physically. Literally. If you think about the worst event in your life and gently scrutinize your awareness over your body, you will discover that someday in your body, you feel a physical sensation. This is your body ' s way of alerting you to things in your life that aren ' t good for you. If you think about the best event in your life - your happiest memory - you can scrutinize your body and discover the physical sensation that equals joy. Mine is this awesome spiraling sensation that begins in the headquarters of my chest and grows heavier and added as it moves upward toward my head. My body registers negativity in my stomach - I feel like there is a pile of rocks in there. If you tune in to your Body Compass ofttimes, it literally works like a compass. You can envisage the things on your to - do brochure and stare what your body thinks of them. Laundry - not completely rocks in the stomach, but pebbles for inarguable. Writing - ahhh, big spirals moving up, up, up.
The key spell there is " tune in to your body. " Did I do that, previous to my health pass? No, no, and no. Unquestionably not. I was not one iota aware of my Body Compass. Well, when would I have found the time? I was too busy scheduling my never - ending brochure of activities that needed to be finished positively, then beating myself up over the results, which never, ever lined up my expectations. I was too busy anxiously analyzing element I did, scheduling more things to do, hating myself for not being perfect, ( as though nobody is perfect, I really should be ), and looking for the next thing I could achieve to make myself feel better about myself.
I ' m getting exhausted just remembering.
I remember motility the rocks - in - my - stomach reaction in high prepare, but I did not recognize it as my Body Compass. I contemplation I had an ulcer or something, since my stomach hurt all the time. Strangely, that off-course when I stopped dating the misconstrued - for - me person I was dating at the time. Then, in college, I had a recurrence of that stomach nut, right as I was pushing myself to take every elegance offered at the university and get frank A ' s in all of them. Hmmm. Did I listen? No, of course not. No pain, no gain, right?
I did not listen, and I did not listen, and I did not listen. So my body got louder, and louder, and louder. It refused to let me ignore it. First I got carpal hollow. Then I got bladder symptoms. Next was lower back pain. Followed by increased vaginal itching ( which always popped up along with the rocks - in - the - stomach ), followed by vaginal pain. Then, vulvar pain and burning. My body was so ailing of me not listening, that it was literally weak. And it only got sicker, and sicker, and sicker, until ultimately, I stopped gadget and tuned in to the poor physical home of my very stumped self.
Since that first moment of communication, my body and I have developed a fantastic relationship. For about a life after my vaginal symptoms went away, I would get a little twinge of burning anytime I contemplated something that wasn ' t right for me. I listened. Now, it ' s back to just the rocks in the stomach. I sit up and take attention, opine me. I never want my body to have to lament again. Ever. It was not a pleasant experience.
My definition of a somatizer is this: someone whose body is screaming at them to listen to its messages. Why are we type A, overachieving, utopian, anxious, shy women prone to infection? My theory, and it ' s new and as sometime unpolished, is we are the women who do not listen to our Body Compasses. We are too busy, we are focused on our achievements, we are thinking about making existence perfect, we are stressing about every little thing, we are worrying about subject possible, and we are not confident within ourselves. We do not listen. It ' s time to tune in to these magical bodies that know much, much more than our minds. These maestro bodies will keep guiding us, always, to our own North Stars, which is really just code for true joy, comfort, and happiness in the very core of your being.
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