Grieving is a process that starts at different points for different people after encountering a tragedy. Some start straight away while others berth dormant in shock until the reality of the longitude hits home. Either way there is a large part of grieving that is unexpected and unexplained. It’ s the bits that you have to deal with long after the tragedy has taken place. The mental and emotional damage, the suppressed fears, distortions of the mind, all of these things are the post traumatic effects of loss.
I would like to knock off this article to promote the awareness of the after - after effects of loss due to darkness of a loved one. These are the long term effects that subside subterranean within the sub consciousness and ratiocination of the mind. It is common amongst friends and other people to clout the view that a tragedy is something that happens, you process and eventually convert to and ‘ get over’. While this is the general path an disfigured person takes it doesn’ t necessarily close that after a bit or so that person has mended completely and the happening no longer has any substantial flak. It is also common for those grieving to suppose this is the correct path as they too are unaware of the post traumatic effects it has. It is natural in this locus for the grieved person to feel emotions of engagement for not of having healed. You create to ask yourself questions such as ‘ why am I not over this? ”, “ am I not strong enough to get over it”, “ how come I still feel sad”, “ why can’ t I motion on”, “ everyone is sick of judicatory about it”, “ I must be a bad person if I can’ t let this go”. The fact of the matter is that when you have lost someone near and dear you never ‘ get over’ the event. Finish and tragedy is not a matter of being torn and repaired but more a matter of learning to incorporate the experience of the event into who you are. You are now someone who has experienced a tragedy. The loss of loosing that special person is an adaptation, not a recovery. You are not ‘ broken’ but ‘ changed’. It is and so important to own people the shelter way to find room in their character and personality to incorporate this change.
One suggestive change that can arise is a sense of energetic sensitivity to the fragility and insecurity of love and life. People who have suffered loss may feel more compassion for human benevolent, life is not so concrete. You may become more aware of peoples feelings and feel boiling when people are insensitive to each other. Anger is an sentiment embedded in loss that dwells long after the event has subsided. It is set off easily and oftentimes expresses itself in unexpected ways. It is common to feel fit to be tied at the world; as if it has stolen unfairly from you and that it is evil and cruel. Loss provokes questions such as ‘ why me?
’, ‘ why them? ” and feelings of “ it’ s not objective! ” and “ how could you! ”. The griever has to learn latitude to put these feelings and how to deal with them. On top of this it is also common to feel insane at the person whom you have lost, distracted at yourself for excitement demented and illogical at the world for letting such a beastly thing arise.
A lot of this anger is hard to express and can much lead to suppression and depression. I think it is important for those who have grieved to go easy on themselves and even more important for those around them to overture their full back. This is not always easy as depressed people are often pessimistic to share, making communicate hard. It is common to feel as though the subject is ban and that no one wants to hear your story, that it is a tax to the listener and vicious to jettison an extreme assessment of negative emotions onto the shoulders of a main squeeze. So a lot of people chose to retract emotionally, allowing uncertain thoughts and feelings to be pushed to the side, or to the naught of the pile. This can lead to a device of suppression as every time those feelings resurface in line to be processed, the mind pushes them back down labelling them ‘ bad’ thoughts. This is an abundantly unhealthy cycle as it is the job of the sub with it to confirm these negative energies are released corresponding to the way the liver cleans your body of toxins. Pending negative emotions create a build up of negative patterns in the brain along with mean business chemical releases that create hormones of anger, subjection, fear, anxiety and stress. These are the long term negative effects I talk of. Unless dealt with properly, these side effects could go on for years preventing the person from experiencing healthy relationships and closing them off to feelings of love, heat and fulcrum. Ofttimes loosing someone puts extreme pressure on all coping mechanisms of the body in this way.
All of us will all at sometimes in our life experience loss. Passing over is apart of life as life is apart of us. It is important to recollect that there is no one way to go about grieving, that everyone does it differently. Be aware that a person who has suffered loss is forever discrepant and that it is just as hard to discern them as it is for them to take in themselves. It is common to feel apprehensive, threatening and scared for many senescence after the event. That some people will always fear losing the ones they love and may feel resilient to let love in again. So please be empathetic with those who have lost. Pain of loss is a healing process and a process that is delicate, long term and forever proposing new learning’ s. There is no manual to coping with loss and it is something that will continually dab up as the grieved learn to bind their senescent relationships and lives with the new person they have learnt to become.
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